Friday, March 13
The Bad Seed...
The media have changed drastically over the last 30 years. What used to be in poor taste or simply *unthinkable* has become perfectly acceptable these days. Cable TV has managed to make us believe that humilation and contempt for human beings (fear factor et al) actually is entertainment.
What does it say about us, about the state of affairs if we (i. e. a large portion of society) consider these types of shows entertaining...it's all about humilation, ridiculing and exposing people...
We have sold out our human dignity...and what have we traded our dignity in for...for fast bucks, and our 15 minutes of fame...
We have to reconsider our attitude towards the media, TV, the internet. Shows that damage the dignity of an individual (I bet you will et al) should be banned - full stop. This may sound over-the-top, but disrespect and bullying both start HERE.
That's what I tried to break to my kids at school today...It always starts with *little things* and it goes further down from there - *little things* accumulate. Also, we get used to this stuff quite easily...it's called habituation.
We have to monitor what our kids see on TV, in the internet...and no, dissing someone isn't funny, really, as much as ridiculing people in public isn't - it is simply inacceptable.
We have too root out this "bad seed"...before it blossoms.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
15 comments:
You don't know how hard I try to instill the best values in a six and nine year old. At the same time, I worry so much about them. I worry about bullies, violence, or perhaps one of them being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I worry about them not growing up to be all that they can be or giving up on a dream. I worry about them not being strong enough to ward off peer pressure. I know they will mess up (they are human), but I hope it's nothing major that will tear apart their life and future.
At the same time, I realize I am not perfect and there are a lot more things I can say and do to make sure that I gave it my all, as far as parenting and coaching them goes.
My kids will not be a horrific news topic (I must take on this attitude and be proactive!). I will search their rooms and talk to them often. I will be interested in what went on at school, at school dances, at sleepovers, etc. I will notice behavioral changes. I won't ignore things and toss it into The Typical Teenage Behavior Bin. I will not!
Great topic, Stone.
Akilah, I would consider sending your kids to private or parochial school (or maybe you do already). Unless you live in a really good neighborhood, public school is full of bad influences.
One thing I've noticed about TV recently is that the "reality" shows seem to make an effort to humiliate women for entertainment. Unfortunately they seem able to find women who go along with this, presumably for money.
Thank you for putting me right about the Weimar Republic. I was mixing up my centuries in an astonishingly inept way.
As for present-day cultural messages being beamed into our minds - I seldom watch television anymore - well, we try and watch French tv to help with the language. From the sound of it you are pretty tri-lingual so you probably don't have to brush up on your skills.
Hey French Fancy :-)
Thanks for stopping by!!
Well...he *died* in Weimar. That could explain the mix-up :-)
**I seldom watch television anymore**
Ditto! There's so much crap on TV these days, mostly reality shows, banalities etc. etc.
French tv really sux in my book...I lived in France for two years (Lyon) and I was so longing for German TV.
TV5 and ARTE are really good though...
I bet Brittany is beautiful, that's about the only part of France that I haven't seen yet...the Atlantic coast...*green with envy*!!
Why do you live in France? I miss the food...sniff...les chocolatiers, the good cheese...memories :)
I can understand how you feel, Akilah...and no matter what you do, you cannot control everything, can you...
That must be really really frustrating.
I wonder how the parents of the boy feel...it must be horrendous for them...they must be asking themselves what the *HELL* went wrong.
I believe that despite having a huge impact on your kids, one's impact is somewhat limited...you cannot account for everything your child does...
Maybe this boy simply wasn't wired right, if you know what I mean - and what are you supposed to do in such a case?
PS...he seemingly never underwent treatment - that's at least what his parents claim.
Private schools are great, Elizabeth...*if* you can afford them...they're quite expensive here!
The public school they attend is pretty good. All I ever heard before I moved was how great the schools are in my county. So far, so good.
I don't think every person who eventually "loses their mind" had parents who didn't do a good job. But yes, you have to let them go at a certain point and cross your fingers so tightly, it pains you.
You pray they have decent friends who don't have a negative impact on them. You pray they lead more than follow. You hope like crazy whenever you turn on the news and see horrific stories left and right.
There's two things that might be ideas, Akilah, though I don't know of course if you're already doing these things :-) but they are things I would do if I had children.
Teachers are a big deal. They are. Ultimately, kids move standardly between the school and home. What happens inbetween is somewhat more controllable than what happens in school. If a teacher is good and invested and keeps a good eye on the kids, there is a lot less to worry about. My parents I guess influenced me in that aspect of looking at growing up; they thought teachers were key, too. A teacher can mean the difference between college and the streets, literally. A teacher can be the difference between ambition/belief, and doubt - and doubt leaves room for following the wrong people. If a child is inspired to believe in him/herself fully, they are less likely to blindly follow... and that faith comes from both home and teachers.
The other thing, I think you are already doing. Keep communication lines open, and give the kids responsibilities that are fun. A lot of parents think that responsibilities should mostly be taught through, say, chores and homework. But sometimes, involving a kid in fun adult decisions is VERY good for their self esteem. And it can encourage them to think strongly for themselves. For instance, my parents would involve me in choosing vacation destinations; it looks like something small but it's not. It encourages a child to develop an oversight of options and reasons to do one thing and not another.
My dad always says "Nell couldn't be raised, she already knew everything she wanted and felt" - yeah I was a smartass, wiseass little thing... but I truly continue to believe that I became responsible as a teen and young woman, because my parents trusted me, took my opinion seriously, believed in me and always involved me in discussions. They never did anything without explaining why, and they'd let me have my say (wether it had influence or not). That makes you confident and independent minded, if you grow up being asked for a well-considered opinion.
As for TV... TV is sad. MTv sends me straight into a state of desperation. "The Hills"... puh-lease!
So true! When I was a little girl I never watched the news because it was so grown-up and absolutely boring. News now is more for entertainment than anything really newsworthy.
To prove my point: my children watch the news like any other Disney program. They laugh, ohhh, and get emotional over what they see as if watching a movie.
Now some of the news is worthy of coverage, but I beg to differ. A lot of it is still too trashy for color TV.
Thanks for the suggestions, JR.
JR
Thanks for the brilliant suggestions.
Akilah
My first little bot started school last September and already I've noticed a change in him. His tacher ie brilliant but some of the children have no respect for anything and a little of it is rubbing off on him.
I hate it. You try so hard to teach them right and wrong but other children have a huge influence.
Very true. I recall being in a few classes with disruptive students who drove the teacher completely mad. Then other students seemed to just give up and act like idiots as well. But yes, their peers have huge influences on them.
**But yes, you have to let them go at a certain point and cross your fingers so tightly**
That's absolutely true, Akilah! You can only do so much...
**Teachers are a big deal**
Absolutely, Nell...a teacher can "make it" or "break it" - as a teacher you hold the key...you can open doors and new worlds or you can forever lock them.
That being said...you can only do as much as the pupil allows and if the home is dysfunctional and rotten, there is little you can do as a teacher.
Teachers are important, but you can only act within a limited range...
And while we need motivated teachers who engage, we also need motivated students who engage...and I cannot tell you how often I have been *disappointed* by the glaring lack of interest and motivation among many of my students...
They expect to be "entertained"...they expect to "consume", they're so much less willing to "produce" - even when it concerns topics that are interesting and appealing...so many of them seem so "full" and "numbed" by our daily dose of SOMA (alias TV)...it's sad really...
**News now is more for entertainment than anything really newsworthy.**
You name it, BIBI...and that's part of the problem...news shouldn't be entertainment...why play a thrilling tune in the background while showing images of a shoot-out, a war...
How on Earth are kids supposed to differenciate between fact and fiction, between the "real" world and the entertainment world, real life and movies?
The lines have become so blurry...
**but some of the children have no respect for anything**
Same here, Cleo...and that's a big problem...some kids have no more respect these days.
And yes, your peers have a huge impact on you - especially at a certain age...when parents and grown-ups are so un-cool.
Post a Comment