My Father...

Paths...

I guess I'm going through a mild midlife crisis at the moment :)

Life is about choices, decisions...and what I'm currently doing is question every major decision that I've taken thus far in my life...
Should I have been more daring, more courageous, less reasonable, less cautious...Should I have studied photography after all - instead of linguistics...etc Perhaps these questions inevitably come with age, maybe it's normal to question oneself and one's choices rather strongly at a certain stage in one's life...
I can definitely say that it is tiring to question oneself...tiring and somewhat frustrating, but perhaps it's healthy to take an honest look at oneself and to honestly ask oneself if one is happy with one's life, with one's choices.
Is this my path...are these my goals...?
Right now I know less than I ever knew...not that I ever really had one single goal, one singular dream in my life that I wanted to accomplish at all costs. I've always had short-term goals (life has taught me not to plan too long ahead)...like getting my MA in lingustics, like working at a university abroad...
Maybe the security that I have now (even the possibility to become a civil servant at the end of the training period), the kind of security that I never had in the past, is in fact a honey trap - a golden cage.
Golden and as sweet as honey...
Security in the face of a global financial crisis is a very tempting and promising perspective...but nonetheless...it feels like a cage somehow - like a trap. So that's it, that's what I'm gonna do for the rest of my (professional) life...
As much as I like teaching, this perspective isn't all that golden in my book, it's choking me somehow...
Security...too much security appeases you, too much security has the potential to make you phlegmatic and lethargic...
I believe that you need to stay "hungry" to some degree in order to make the most of your potential...too much security can allay this hunger...

Life is about choices...have I made the right choices and most importantly, am I on the right path...on my path or - in reference to my last blog - am I in my element? I don't know...not yet at least...

Nederland...

When I think of the Netherlands, I think WATER...there is no other place I know where water is the domineering element.